Stephen Colbert’s Hilarious Rant On The ‘War On Women’ Is Actually Accurate

On The Colbert Report last night Stephen Colbert’s ultra-conservative, right-wing persona took on the “War on Women.” His call that this alleged GOP “woman problem” is just a democrat accusation and fantasy of the liberal media was hilarious but in describing his fellow Republicans’ view on women and their finances, we were reminded that some people do think this way. That may not be quite as hilarious.

To prove that he is a pro-women Colbert introduced a new segment or sorry, “seg-woment” called “Colbert’s Lady Heroes,” which, of course, features all men. “Conservative men feel comfortable speaking for women. They understand it’s not a uter-u, it’s a uter-us.”

His first hero was Wisconsin state Sen. Glenn Grothman who is on board with the fact that “wage discrimination is a myth.” Boy, if that’s true half my daily articles are pointless. Grothman argues, wait for it, that money is simply more important for men. Of course, a husband lawyer is going to make more money than his wife who is also a lawyer because she took a few years off to raise their children because who needs money? Women quitting their jobs to take care of the kids has nothing to do with the fact that they have maternal instincts or can’t afford to hire a nanny (and clearly their husband isn’t going to quit his job.)

“Women don’t care about money. I’m not even sure if they cash their paychecks. Besides good luck even finding them in those handbags. Am I right fellas? Money is a guy thing, like football, buffalo wings or deciding what is fair compensation for women. Besides, us dudes need the cash to impress the ladies. They have way less money for some reason,” said Colbert. And he is totally right. I only cash my pachecks so I have something to put in my pretty pink Kate Spade wallet which I then put in my giant handbag.

I laughed hilariously at this clip but in all seriousness this is really upsetting. Colbert is making a parody of people who really think this about women BUT PEOPLE REALLY THINK THIS ABOUT WOMEN! Grothman is a real person. He is not made up. Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker, who last week overturned his state’s equal pay law, also recently told The Daily Beast,“You could argue that money is more important for men. I think a guy in their first job, maybe because they expect to be a breadwinner someday, may be a little more money-conscious. To attribute everything to a so-called bias in the workplace is just not true.” According to Business Insider, Walker has come under fire for his decision to repeal the law, which was passed largely to address Wisconsin’s huge gap in male and female wages. Since the equal pay law was passed in 2009, the state has risen from 36th to 24th in national gender pay parity rankings. Republican frontrunner Mitt Romney hasn’t said much on the issue but he clearly has a woman voters problem (which is why he is hiding behind his wife whenever anyone asks him about it.)

The War on Women provides great fodder for comedians like Colbert, but it’s pretty depressing otherwise. Thank you to TheJaneDough for tipping us off to this.

Watch the video here.

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    • Cathy

      The more nuanced truth is that women reveal through their choices that they do not care about money in the same way and to the same degree that men do.

      Women are more likely than men to take time out of their careers to care for parents and children. You do less paid work, you earn less money. This isn’t because anyone is waging a war on women. Women are waging war on their own earning potential by dropping out and hanging back to prioritize their home lives.

      • LCT

        This is a good point, and what I’ve been thinking about the issue. I think the problem is connected to many things, and being reductionist about it (whether blaming it on women’s “inherent bias against money” or solely on male oppression) is incorrect.